Did It!

I did it!  I actually completed a 5k Run/Walk (I walked, obviously), and best of all...I did NOT come in last!  Close, but not last!

Yesterday most of my family participated in the 5k Run/Walk to honor my daughter's college graduation.  It was waaaay better, and waaaay more fun, than sitting through an actual graduation, although we'd have done that if she'd chosen that. 

Look at us there, all rarin' to go!

Thankfully it was a chilly, rainy day so there was very little, if any, sweating involved.  I do NOT sweat if at all possible.  It is not my thing.  

I had two personal goals for yesterday:

1)  to finish

AND

   2) to NOT finish last.  

Accomplished both, thankyouverymuch!! 

(Andy, Colleen, Chelsea, Bobby and moi)

It was a joyous feeling crossing that line with so much of my family close by, especially seeing my husband's smiling face waiting for me!  

I have no idea what in God's name I was gazing off into the sunset for, but this man is my biggest fan, and I cherish that.  I don't always tell him that, but I do.  His love gives me the courage to go out into this world and do what I gotta do.  We all deserve to feel that.  

Anyway...

I had fun, I felt good, and yes, I'd do it again.  

I HAVE RACE STATS!

Here are my STATS.  

Pretty lame but they're MY STATS!  

↑  Our graduate!  ↑

(Cate, yourstruly, and Bob)

(Bob, Colleen and Andy aka HotDogMan)

(Josh, Chelsea, Bobby, Autumn, Cate, Adrienne, and Colleen)

(Autumn and Adrienne)

(Cate, Autumn, Adrienne, Colleen, Chelsea, Bobby, me)

(my baby, Colleen and me)

'Til next time...

Walk on.

     

Clementine Wins Over Chips Ahoy!

Finally got to walk again today; yesterday was a day filled with rain, and lots of it!

I have to say that I could feel the determination beginning to wane somewhat today, maybe because it's another gray day, maybe because I haven't walked consistently.  Either way, I got out there before I could totally lose my "oomph".

There is progress, though.  While I wasn't jumping up and down to walk today, the positive mind chatter was much louder and more persistent than the negative mind chatter, and THAT is success.

I'm feeling blue today because it's the 14th anniversary of losing Dad.  I still miss him.  Too many emotions to accurately put into words, so I won't try.

I started to go for my standard "drug of choice", Chips Ahoy cookies, but instead, I peeled and ate a clementine. Hence, "Clementine Wins Over Chips Ahoy".

Every single small success adds up.

I sit in my cottage for a little bit after my walks, mostly to just have some quiet time.  

I'm starting to feel a little bit proud of myself for not quitting, 

but I also know that that's a precarious thought. 

So again, I thank You, God, for keeping me going. 

A Breakthrough

I had a personal breakthrough today.  It's an unfamiliar feeling, but a positive one.

I went to Kohl's and tried on a shit-ton of outfits, all of them plus sizes.  My regular size plus size pant went up a size, which disgusts me.  But I needed them, so I bought them...three pair of capris and two tops. 

On the drive home, I got so angry and tearful, then successfully talked myself OUT of walking today with my typical negative mind chatter:

Why bother.

It will never make a difference.

I went up a size so it doesn't matter.

It's a waste of my time.

I can't do it.

But something odd happened - a feeling came over me as I was turning onto Piper Road from Piper Cross, a feeling of inner warmth.  And I said "of course I'm going to walk".  

And I did. 

I did it.

I. Did. It.

Thank You, God.